Influencing the influencer

Photos by Linh Tran, throughtheglass.photo

Set/Labriells Earrings/Zara

Do I still blog? Guess..so?

I know that this blog used to be a sarcastic diary of a not-so bloggerish type of girl, aka ME. The past few weeks have been incredibly hard and if it stays like that, I might have to say goodbye to blogging. I know that when I moved here everyone thought that I will be active and show more interesting stuff (because Paris!)but the reality kicks in, and in reality I'm a working student. Not a blogger, not an influencer, not glamorous at all. I rarely wear makeup and I don't give a fuck about my looks, and I guess that's why I became just a regular sad and tired human being... How you can love fashion so much but can't afford (time wise) to look good? Heartbreaking. You might seen the instagram story that I made about a week ago, where I was quickly telling about how really my life works now. It's not that I want to cry on your shoulder, it was just to show you the truth. I think that influencing people is not going to work if you are constantly lying about everything. That's why I wanted to show the real side, that every fucking picture on instagram looks pretty and my life seems perfect, but I work my ass off for the life that I have here. I know I'm not the only one like that, you know, studying and working, but here in France living like that is not so popular and students are usually enjoying their lives without jobs. I'm guessing maybe it's because you really spend the whole day in university here, and after 9 hours of straight learning you just want to go home and sleep everything away. But, then the weekend comes. I work all the weekend, double shifts a day, the place is fucking messed up, and so are the people. After a week like this, how you feel inside and outside is just dead.

I'm not mad at my parents. I chose this life myself. Paris was my biggest dream and I'm happy that they allowed me to go here, even if now I'm alone and I had to grow up a little bit faster than others in case to survive in a big city. Just sometimes I wish money could fall from the sky... AND I HATE IT! Because if you think about it, how can a piece of paper control your life so hard, huh? It's fucked up.

Someone has to influence the influencer, because I just lost it.